porcelain

you close your eyes and see yourself as impenetrable steel
you look in the mirror and realize how fragile you really are

fuck you for not knowing who you are
fuck me for believing i was wanted

i made myself vulnerable because of you
i let myself think that life was ready to refresh

accept my apologies for being so disappointing
except, how could you have known i was so underwhelming

you fell in love with me based on my words
you distanced yourself when you realized how tenuous i was

we are both but shards of porcelain
we will never find true levity in ourselves

affair

Undress:
regress,
pretend,
offend.
Dress -
forget.

prevail

Sunlight engulfs the horizon
The morning dew is blinded into nothing
You fight for that extra moment of sleep
I smile as your hair strays across my chest
Bliss

Our opposites are electric
You never leave my mind
I cherish the moments
Your mouth curls into a smile

My knees are dirty from always falling short
This time is for real
Erase the doubt from your mind
This is the time
Our love will prevail

I never speak the words
That fill this heart to overflow
How I adore you is what you need to know

My knees are dirty from always falling short
This time is for real
Erase the doubt from your mind
This is the time
Our love will prevail

you hold me down - come pick me up

so i have written about "sally" off and on the last few months. but i think i am just fucking things up - i am not sure i am letting a connection happen. i know it's all me - i know i am the one who makes thing complicated.

i just need to step out of the mud and get on solid ground - run - not wallow.


sigh.