book reviews
i was talking about some of my favorite books in a meeting earlier today and Jody asks me.
"what about books like Charlotte's Web and The DaVinci Code"
i replied
well i think Charlotte was a great spy and and The Davinci code is probably the best book about summer camps i have read"
after the confused look left the faces of the people in my meeting i promised them all full reviews of those two books - plus the classic The Merchant of Venice.
here are the reviews up. for the sake of literature
Charlotte’s Web
By EB White
this is a very, very dark and suspenseful psychological thriller about a femme fatale spy named Charlotte. growing up as a child, Charlotte was violated by a clown. the hate and anger that boils deep within her along with a bad haircut is the basis for her being the worlds most dangerous assassin…
the majority of the book takes place in Sao Paulo, Brazil where Charlotte is on assignment to assassinate the Prime Minister of Greenland where through a connection from her dark and disturbing past is a given a key that could unlock the puzzle which will unravel game which will untangle the web which will unfurl the secret to a government conspiracy that will change the lives of possibly 15 people forever.
it's truly a riveting book with many twists and turns and webs and other such things of that nature…although the ending is a bit confusing it has something to do with pink socks and aluminum siding it’s still a thrill ride you don’t want to miss.
The DaVinci Code
By Dan Brown
The DaVinci Code is an amazing, groundbreaking and controversial book. the story takes place on Wankatawanna Lake at Camp Mellencougar where a group of rag tag kids led by a slacker camp counselor are pitted against the rich kids camp across the lake in the annual Summer Fun-athlon and yell-off.
In order to save Camp Mellencougar from being torn down, Lance, Shawn, Cody, Fritoface and Squidlips have made a hastily thrown together wager against Reginald and Harrison, the villainous rich kids of Camp Wertilliger. if Camp Mellencougar wins the Summer Fun-athlon and yell-off, they get to keep the camp and Grandpa Sandpants, the loveable alcoholic owner of the camp finally gets that liver transplant he’s always wanted. and if Camp Wertilliger wins, the Mellencougar kids have to eat worms in front of the whoring and one-dimensional girls of Camp Lillyfoot
The DaVinci Code is really a hilarious, raunchy non-stop laugh riot. you not only learn a little something about yourself but you also get to learn how to hoist a fat kids underwear up the flag pole, hoist the gay kids underwear up the flag pole and how to love. in paperback now.
The Merchant of Venice
By William Shakespeare
don’t be fooled by the rocks that she’s got, she’s still she’s still Jenny from the block. that’s right, Jennifer Lopez, America’s favorite latina superstar and booty de-jour is at it again. J-Lo plays the character of Jessica Hernandez Consuela Jimenez Juarez Juarez, a posh yet down on her luck secretary that ends up in Venice somehow…
while in Venice, she falls in love w/ a merchant who is from Venice (hence the title of course). through a series of hilarious gags such as comically falling down on the runway to bumping into Burt Reynolds to crashing a boat into a nunnery in the famous waterways of the city of love to fucking a police officer in the neck, J-Lo wins our hearts once again.
the 1st half of the book is a little slow. for some reason they get into the technical aspects of reverse osmosis but, overall it’s a thrilling non-stop, breathtaking thrill ride that is breathtaking and a thrill ride.
"what about books like Charlotte's Web and The DaVinci Code"
i replied
well i think Charlotte was a great spy and and The Davinci code is probably the best book about summer camps i have read"
after the confused look left the faces of the people in my meeting i promised them all full reviews of those two books - plus the classic The Merchant of Venice.
here are the reviews up. for the sake of literature
Charlotte’s Web
By EB White
this is a very, very dark and suspenseful psychological thriller about a femme fatale spy named Charlotte. growing up as a child, Charlotte was violated by a clown. the hate and anger that boils deep within her along with a bad haircut is the basis for her being the worlds most dangerous assassin…
the majority of the book takes place in Sao Paulo, Brazil where Charlotte is on assignment to assassinate the Prime Minister of Greenland where through a connection from her dark and disturbing past is a given a key that could unlock the puzzle which will unravel game which will untangle the web which will unfurl the secret to a government conspiracy that will change the lives of possibly 15 people forever.
it's truly a riveting book with many twists and turns and webs and other such things of that nature…although the ending is a bit confusing it has something to do with pink socks and aluminum siding it’s still a thrill ride you don’t want to miss.
The DaVinci Code
By Dan Brown
The DaVinci Code is an amazing, groundbreaking and controversial book. the story takes place on Wankatawanna Lake at Camp Mellencougar where a group of rag tag kids led by a slacker camp counselor are pitted against the rich kids camp across the lake in the annual Summer Fun-athlon and yell-off.
In order to save Camp Mellencougar from being torn down, Lance, Shawn, Cody, Fritoface and Squidlips have made a hastily thrown together wager against Reginald and Harrison, the villainous rich kids of Camp Wertilliger. if Camp Mellencougar wins the Summer Fun-athlon and yell-off, they get to keep the camp and Grandpa Sandpants, the loveable alcoholic owner of the camp finally gets that liver transplant he’s always wanted. and if Camp Wertilliger wins, the Mellencougar kids have to eat worms in front of the whoring and one-dimensional girls of Camp Lillyfoot
The DaVinci Code is really a hilarious, raunchy non-stop laugh riot. you not only learn a little something about yourself but you also get to learn how to hoist a fat kids underwear up the flag pole, hoist the gay kids underwear up the flag pole and how to love. in paperback now.
The Merchant of Venice
By William Shakespeare
don’t be fooled by the rocks that she’s got, she’s still she’s still Jenny from the block. that’s right, Jennifer Lopez, America’s favorite latina superstar and booty de-jour is at it again. J-Lo plays the character of Jessica Hernandez Consuela Jimenez Juarez Juarez, a posh yet down on her luck secretary that ends up in Venice somehow…
while in Venice, she falls in love w/ a merchant who is from Venice (hence the title of course). through a series of hilarious gags such as comically falling down on the runway to bumping into Burt Reynolds to crashing a boat into a nunnery in the famous waterways of the city of love to fucking a police officer in the neck, J-Lo wins our hearts once again.
the 1st half of the book is a little slow. for some reason they get into the technical aspects of reverse osmosis but, overall it’s a thrilling non-stop, breathtaking thrill ride that is breathtaking and a thrill ride.
posted by brandon at
3:41 PM
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