l'enfer, c'est les autres
as Sartre brilliantly said "hell is other people"
the big defining word there is PEOPLE - to me - right now - PEOPLE refers to two things.
1) myself
2) my "old" friends
this quote comes from a really great play called No Exit - basically 3 people are sent to hell and forced to sit in rooms alone - to be with themselves - at one point a character says "l'enfer, c'est les autres" or "hell is other people"
ultimately i can only take responsibility for my actions and not of those i decided to surround myself with.
their "i can do whatever i want as long as i'm willing to accept the fallout" attitude rubbed off on me and put me in a really depressing situation
but really it wasn't any specific thing that they did or did not do - it was the fact i let these other PEOPLE create a personal view of myself through their eyes not my own.
essentially i wasn't trying to define myself by the person i knew i was inside - i was letting myself believe that whatever the world around thought of me was truth and that was the person i was to be.
i let other PEOPLE make me introverted when really at heart i am a complete extrovert
what do people really want?
they want to be liked, admired, respected, even treated with veneration. i'd argue that almost all healthy people want this.
there are extroverts who always jump all over the introverts saying, “why do you care what other people think? i don’t care what anyone thinks!”
i think this is one of the lies we go around telling ourselves. we want to believe that we are our own masters and that we're are not addicted to feel-good snacks from other humans.
however, what if an extrovert who thinks that wakes up one day to find that everyone hated them? all of their friends and loved ones have abandoned them. they go outside and people spit at them and curse them.
they would be crushed - they would be lost as to what to do - the moment they are alone with their thoughts and feelings - the only plausible option may seem like death
so to reprimand myself and to truly be honest with myself i have to let go of the “i don’t care what anyone thinks of me!” mentality. it's completely wrong. we do care; we care too much.
the big defining word there is PEOPLE - to me - right now - PEOPLE refers to two things.
1) myself
2) my "old" friends
this quote comes from a really great play called No Exit - basically 3 people are sent to hell and forced to sit in rooms alone - to be with themselves - at one point a character says "l'enfer, c'est les autres" or "hell is other people"
ultimately i can only take responsibility for my actions and not of those i decided to surround myself with.
their "i can do whatever i want as long as i'm willing to accept the fallout" attitude rubbed off on me and put me in a really depressing situation
but really it wasn't any specific thing that they did or did not do - it was the fact i let these other PEOPLE create a personal view of myself through their eyes not my own.
essentially i wasn't trying to define myself by the person i knew i was inside - i was letting myself believe that whatever the world around thought of me was truth and that was the person i was to be.
i let other PEOPLE make me introverted when really at heart i am a complete extrovert
what do people really want?
they want to be liked, admired, respected, even treated with veneration. i'd argue that almost all healthy people want this.
there are extroverts who always jump all over the introverts saying, “why do you care what other people think? i don’t care what anyone thinks!”
i think this is one of the lies we go around telling ourselves. we want to believe that we are our own masters and that we're are not addicted to feel-good snacks from other humans.
however, what if an extrovert who thinks that wakes up one day to find that everyone hated them? all of their friends and loved ones have abandoned them. they go outside and people spit at them and curse them.
they would be crushed - they would be lost as to what to do - the moment they are alone with their thoughts and feelings - the only plausible option may seem like death
so to reprimand myself and to truly be honest with myself i have to let go of the “i don’t care what anyone thinks of me!” mentality. it's completely wrong. we do care; we care too much.
posted by brandon at
10:20 AM
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